Chocolate maiden
Chapter 1 : Chocolate chip muffin
Hinata sighed as the last streaks of light began to fade behind the horizon.
The sky was tinted with bright pinks, and purples. She gazed at the beauty. Evening was her favorite time of day.
Reluctantly, she sat up in her ornate wooden chair, and shut the blinds. It was time to close. As she prepared for her departure she glanced over at the the small clock that sat upon the counter beside the bell. It was almost seven o'clock.
" I guess Sakura got distracted again",she said to herself.
Sakura was usually late to pick Hinata up. Hinata stretched lazily, walked away from her comfort chair. She quietly tempted to a shelf, grabbed her purse,and latched the brass locks along the front shop door. After one long look at the sky, she sat down on the small bench in front of her Chocolate shop.
The crisp sent of outside was calming; like a mothers lullaby. As she took in the sounds and rhythm of the Streets, she felt her mind drift. 'I hope I see him there', she thought to herself. He usually was on a Thursday night.
"Hinata, wake up!!"
Hinata's head jolted out of it's calming state, only to see a blurr of pink and maroon.
" Hey! I know I am usually late, but you don't have to fall asleep on me, I don't take that long!!" Sakura said with a slight giggle. Slightly dazed Hinata Yawned.
"Gomen Sakura-chan, I got a little sleepy." She rubbed the sleepiness from her eyes.
" Well then come on girl, we got some work ta' do." Sakura said after a quick survey of the front shop windows. She began walking not waiting for her friend to follow.
"C-coming" Hinata yelled as she joined her medical buddy to their destination.
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The tranquil sound of a Spanish guitar echoed across the small tavern. The sounds of clattering glasses, silver wear, and mumbling, and laughter filled the atmosphere. Hinata found her night job to be quite enjoyable, almost as much as her part time day job.
The most important reason to the liking of her day job, was that "he" came here almost every other Thursday along with his uchiha friend. She could pick out Naruto's chuckle over ever one elses. The sound of his voice made her heart flutter. The strum of his guitar made her want him more. He seemed to caress it with very stroke of the glittering strings. He played it with such skill. 'He must know so many songs' Hinata sighed to herself. He always played a different song
every time he was here.
There it was shiny and colorful. Colored with greens and blues at the base. They formed an almost lacy pattern. It was there with him and she wasn't. She wanted to be the one to sit upon his lap. Hinata pouted.
"Now I'm jealous of inanimate objects......." She closed her eyes to day dream.
"Hinata?"
Sakura had been watching her quietly for about 5 minutes scanning her almost
comical faces. Hinata did not respond.
"HINATA!!" Her eyes finally flew open.
"Yes!!" Hinata answered almost falling over the counter.
"Please take this to booth number 10" Sakura said with a sweet annoyed
smile.
With an "Hai" Hinata tempted away. 'Boy, that girl is getting worse, I think it's time to be a little sneaky. On that thought, Sakura strutted over to Naruto's and Sasuke's table.
"How are you Sasuke!?" She said with an impish grin.















Comments
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Kishimoto-san, stop toying with our fangirl/bot minds!!
DON"T MAKE ME FLY TO JAPAN WITH CHUCK NORRIS!!
Naruhina fan! You'll be hooked on this epic story for weeks!-->[link]
Nice little angle you've got here with Hinata working in a chocolate shop. It seems to suit her somehow... Probably 'cuz she's so sweet.
Writing tips:
For starters, you need to begin a new paragraph every time a different person speaks. For example, here's how I would have done the following scene:
"Hinata, wake up!!"
Hinata's head jolted out of it's calming state, only to see a blurr of pink and maroon.
"Hey! I know I am usually late, but you don't have to fall asleep on me, I don't take that long!!" Sakura said with a slight giggle.
Slightly dazed Hinata Yawned. "Gomen Sakura-chan, I got alittle sleepy."
"Well then come on girl, we got some work ta' do." Sakura said after a quick survey of the front shop windows. She began walking not waiting for her friend to follow.
"C-coming" Hinata yelled as she joined her medical buddy to their destination.
You also may want to use a different method for uploading. How do you do it? Do you post a file, or do you use the Add Text box?
--
!Warning!
The following NaruHina fan fiction contains action, drama, romance, comedy and an epic story that may enthral some people.
[link]
Viewer addiction is strongly advised!
Because I can't upload, so I use the annoying little text box. *growlz at it* I really can't see all that I am typing with that thing. Oh well.
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Kishimoto-san, stop toying with our fangirl/bot minds!!
DON"T MAKE ME FLY TO JAPAN WITH CHUCK NORRIS!!
Naruhina fan! You'll be hooked on this epic story for weeks!-->[link]
but thats what makes her so cute
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go read this new story called Chocolate maiden made by our friend "~WhiteFoxNinja"
here's the link [link]
I have a really pretty cover for it, but i can't upload anyting. T3T
--
Kishimoto-san, stop toying with our fangirl/bot minds!!
DON"T MAKE ME FLY TO JAPAN WITH CHUCK NORRIS!!
Naruhina fan! You'll be hooked on this epic story for weeks!-->[link]
--
!Warning!
The following NaruHina fan fiction contains action, drama, romance, comedy and an epic story that may enthral some people.
[link]
Viewer addiction is strongly advised!
--
Kishimoto-san, stop toying with our fangirl/bot minds!!
DON"T MAKE ME FLY TO JAPAN WITH CHUCK NORRIS!!
Naruhina fan! You'll be hooked on this epic story for weeks!-->[link]
--
go read this new story called Chocolate maiden made by our friend "~WhiteFoxNinja"
here's the link [link]
--
!Warning!
The following NaruHina fan fiction contains action, drama, romance, comedy and an epic story that may enthral some people.
[link]
Viewer addiction is strongly advised!
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